maaanah!

so the title of the post is something that needs to be explained.
picture yourself having a bit of a day. and then saying 'man'.  but drawing out the aa's a bit and then putting a bit of an h sound on the end.  weird i know.  but you gotta know what i'm trying to say here.

** on with it**
on Tuesdays anne and kate go to the sitter.  i usually spend the time catching up, cleaning, laundry, errands, lunch with a friend, the pool maybe. 
today was the first tuesday.  it was good. i had a boatload of stuff to do.  the weather was supposed to be a little weird, so i planned on being inside most of the day.  i had to go to anne's school and help set up for the teacher appreciation luncheon, take some stuff back to target, buy some ingredients for dinner, make some casseroles for my mother in law who is having surgery...and on and on.

we got up late. strike one.
i had very little time to get home to get stuff accomplished before going to school.
i piddled for bit and got going.
the shift i was supposed to work was supposed to be 30 minutes.
cool. i can do this.
30 minutes passed.  we were still working.  now we were serving, and refilling.  it was fine. i enjoy helping and talking to the teachers and staff, 2 hours and 30 minutes later, i finally said, 'i gotta go'.  the cleanup crew was slight and the moms that were there lent a hand. no big deal.
i buzzed through the store, got the ingredients, returned stuff to target, and got home.
started the dinner for the inlaws.
it got to the part where i needed eggs.
no eggs.
not one ding dang egg in the fridge.
what kind of all American family does not have eggs.
*^%&
i got back in the car. drove to the store.
bought eggs. came back home.
finished dinner.
check.
adam picked anne up for softball practice and i was going to pick kate up to take the dinner to the inlaws...
adam calls.  he picked up anne. but kate was having a stroke that she didn't get to go.
would i hustle to get her.  sure. on my way.
pick kate up. she is fine.  deliver dinner.
leave inlaws.  a path i drive a lot...
i go through a well known intersection...
i am getting pulled over.
what the WHAT?!
i have no clue as to what i had done. 
no clue. none. none whatsoever....
the officer comes to my window and asks for the info. blah blah blah.
apparently i rolled threw a stop sign.
illegal. i get it. the police officer was LESS then friendly. 
i understand. it's their job.  i get it completely. i have a huge respect for the police officers....i really do.
but he was kind of mean.
after it was all over.  he gave me my license etc. back and i went to put it in my wallet, which was in my purse...i am kind of grumpy at this point...i hear him say KEEP YOUR HANDS ON THE WHEEL!
oh *&^%...
OKAY i said.
note to self 'do not reach into your purse while the officer is standing at your car window'. 
even if you think you are so innocent you oddly resemble mother Theresa. 
he gave me my ticket and away we went.
kate didn't say anything for a long time.
she finally squeaked out 'what just happened?'
poor thing.  i think i kind of forgot she was back there.
i laughed. and kind of cried.
we got home.  adam laughed. kind of. when i told him the story.
i put dinner in the oven and started researching a trip for he and i to take this summer...
i followed the exact directions on the recipe.
it burns to a crisp.
a real bad crisp.
really.
he said. WELL GIRLS GET YOUR SHOES ON WE ARE GOING OUT!
ha.
and we did.
i was a bit weepy, but we enjoyed fried chicken and fish and dipped cones, all while sitting at a 'counter' as the girls call it.  it was just a local family restaurant near by that has 'award winning fried chicken'.  adam knew that would fix everything.
he was right. 
what a day.
~chat soon.

summer is here.

and the living is easy.
thursday, the girls and i went to grant's farm. 
it was a sort of 'summer initiation' so to speak.
it was so fun.  i was walking along, trailing behind them thinking...this is good.
no diaper bag, no stroller, just us, and a large tote bag, and a camera...
it was so fun.
we had to get our annual parking pass so we can go just about every other week.
the place never gets old. 
never. ever.

ready for the tram ride

texas long horn....super close.  like really, really close.

anne lived.

feeding the goats.

carousel ride.  kate was so nervous about being on a horse that went up and down.

strange little girl she is sometimes...

who knew the neck of a llama could be so fun?!

because every st. louis child needs a posed picture in front of the wagon! :)

Clydesdale petting.

the beginning and the end

today was the last day of first grade for anne clara.
it was a good day for her.
my mom picked her up and took her to our sweet bobbies house after school.
mom said anne was kind of sad...i asked anne about it this evening.  she said she was afraid of forgetting mrs. schmidt.  God love her.  so innocent. 
here is anne on her first day of first grade.

this is anne on the last day.
i can't stand how much she has grown.  i just can't stand it.

i am so excited about summer.
i'm coming off a great school year. i don't have end of the year exahustion...i'm just ready to jump in. 
i love my girls and i can't wait to spend this summer with them.
~chat soon.

a darn good day.

if you know me...
you know that hallmark holidays just ain't my thing...
they are a whole lot of hype.  and it never fails that even though you brace yourself for they hype and the aftermath, someone is disappointed.
i'm not meaning me, a relative or a friend...someone. it just is awkward.
i had this idea that we would spread mothers day out.
in laws on friday.
my parents on saturday.
us on sunday.
cool.
after a little discussion and some calming down and explaining, i all worked out okay.
on the actual day, we met my in laws at church and then went our separate ways.
we drove around for a bit and looked at houses with different style doors (we are looking for a new door)
then we went home and had leftover chicken dinner for lunch. (high class.) :)
we were going to try to go to Grant's Farm.
i knew it was teetering on heartbreak of a 4 year old and 7 year old.
we gave it a whirl.
it was packed.
i used to work there, so i know how long it is when the line reaches a certain spot.  so we kept driving.
the girls did pretty good with the idea.
we went to a nearby park and had the.best.time.ever.
i kept saying THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER. REALLY GUYS DON'T YOU THINK?!
we walked trails, swung on swings, skipped rocks, stayed at the right distance from the river....
it was just great.
for dinner...crab legs and shrimp.  sweet pete, my favorite dinner.
oh, and the girls (and their daddy) gave me a box of goodies i call 'summer lovin'....sunscreen, beach towel, a southern belle novel (my favorite) an inspirational book on mothering, chocolate, gum, socks...a little bit of adult beverages. (the dad picked those out, i checked)
i hope your day was good too.  mine wasn't over the top with breakfast in bed and diamonds.
just perfect.  a day at the river, a big cardboard box full of things only my clan would know i would like, and a great dinner.
i love them.
so still, i snub the hallmark holiday, but appreciate the effort given by my crew.
~chat soon!

fun on the duck

kate on a 'zipline'

she is getting adventurous.

my 3 loves.  the trail was so beautifully, green.

darling. can't stand it.  they are in love with him and he is in love with them.  perfect equation.

just cool.

checking it out.

anything with an american flag is worth of a photo don't you think?

acting like a super hero.

adam gave anne a shell she acted as if it was a gold nugget.

happy mother's day.

adam said, 'look over there' there was nothing but it made a cute picture.

we found a rock with a hole.  how cool

skipping rocks.

anne found a look out tower.

Mother's Day

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.  She never existed before.  The woman existed, but the mother, never.  A mother is something absolutely new.  ~Rajneesh

 

 Happy Mother's Day to all the momma's out there!
Enjoy your day.
~chat soon!

Ponderings....

Some sweet quotes about momma's.  Thought it was appropriate for this weekend. ;)


A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.  ~Tenneva Jordan

Any mother could perform the jobs of several air traffic controllers with ease.  ~Lisa Alther

You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can't fool mom.  ~Author Unknown
 
Mirror, mirror on the wall,
I am my mother after all.
~Author Unknown
 

One of the very few reasons I had any respect for my mother when I was thirteen was because she would reach into the sink with her bare hands - bare hands - and pick up that lethal gunk and drop it into the garbage.  To top that, I saw her reach into the wet garbage bag and fish around in there looking for a lost teaspoon.  Bare hands - a kind of mad courage.  ~Robert Fulghum

Each one bears some sort of truth and connection.
Happy Mother's Day weekend.
~chat soon!
 

honest.

if you know me.
you know i am honest.
i have something cooped up now for awhile.
and i gotta let it out.
adam moved the business out on september 30, 2011.
we talked all summer about the sacrifice it would be.
it would be a change in budgeting for a bit.  it would be a change in time spent away from home.
i understood. i nodded when i should.  i smiled.
and i meant it all.
we also spoke of the excitement of it.
the uncharted waters.  the new places it could take his company.
it has been 7 months and a little over a week.
let me be frank.
this has been the hardest thing i have done. ever.
and i know it has been the hardest thing adam has ever done.
i'm not saying this to whine or to ask for sympathy.
i am just saying it.
financially, we are stable, because adam is nothing if he isn't frugal, budget minded, and down right anal retentive.  but it has been a strain.  (2 root canals in 3 days hasn't helped).
we are fine.  i'm not hinting that we are destitute, or having to eat spam and mustard sandwiches (as kate told our dear bobbie (angel babysitter) this week.) but we have had to say no to things (like vacation.) and look at things with a critical eye.
we go to several social occasions, networking events where people (mainly wives) will very eagerly say...."aren't you THRILLED to have adam out of the house?"
and i smile, and nod and say, yes....it's nice.
and inside i say this....
NO. I MISS HIM.  I MISS THE FACT THAT HE ISN"T HOME WHEN WE COME HOME (most nights) I MISS THE FACT THAT WE HAVE TO BE ORGANIZED ABOUT DINNER AND HAVE IT TAKEN OUT TO DEFROST THE NIGHT BEFORE. I MISS THE FACT THAT IF I RUN OUT OF INSULIN IN MY PUMP HE CAN'T BRING IT TO ME AT WORK BECAUASE IT'S A SEVEN MINUTE DRIVE FROM HOME....I MISS THE FACT THAT HE/WE DIDN'T HAVE A RENT CHECK AND UTILITY CHECK TO PAY EACH MONTH...I MISS THE FACT THAT IF I LEFT MY CURLING IRON ON I CAN CALL AND SAY CAN YOU CHECK THAT...INSTEAD OF HOPING MY NEIGHBORS DON'T TEXT ME AND SAY...WERE YOU EXPECTING A FIRE TRUCK OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE TODAY?????? I MISS THE FACT THAT IF HE 'WORKS LATE' HE ISN'T IN THE BASEMENT....HE IS NOT HERE. 
some may read that and say. LORDY IS SHE A SNOT.
i don't mean to sound that way....but honestly, i was NOT aware of the change it would be on our life.
it's a good change.  things are getting into a rhythm.  i carry my insulin with me, i unplug the curling iron every morning so i know it won't burn the house down.  adam worries about eating, so he takes care of taking the meat out of the freezer...its just different.  
am i thankful that we were able to engage in this outstanding opportunity, especially in this economy?  am i thankful that the company is selling their tail feathers off?  certainly.  am i thankful that God has held our hand through this.  TOTALLY.
but sometimes, it just feels good to be honest.
so there you have it.
it's been tough.  and if you have had any ounce of us in the last 7 months and a little over a week since the actual business left our home.  i thank you.  i thank you so much.  if you picked up our  children, listened to me, listened to adam, celebrated with us, worried with us, watched us, prayed for us....we couldn't have done it without you.  and i mean that. honest.

how are you?

man. time flies.  i posted the last post last thursday. here it is wednesday and i haven't even looked at this silly thing.
i seriously feel i am in a cross between a wind tunnel and a hamster wheel. 
picture that. 
blowing around and running in place.
 it's just ugly.
it's just busy.
i have said before, we aren't super tight scheduled people.
i don't do well with that.  since i don't do well.  really none of us here at our home do well with that.
i'm trying to keep it happy and mellow.  i think it is working? (that is a bold face LIE!)
i have 9 1/2 days of school.  (school days-not weekends)
anne has one more day then me. 
then the real fun begins.
last weekend adam didn't work.
at all. 
first time in months.  more months then i care to admit.
i'm not counting...it doesn't matter.
he was home and that was fun.
we cleaned out closets and pantries. 
and now we have all the leftovers strewn throughout our house. 
that was saturday. today is wednesday.  the stuff still sits. 
yesterday we had a friend of anne's to help get to girlscouts, anne's softball practice, the girlscout fly-up ceremony, kate to get, and dinner...really that shouldn't be hard.  oh and 3 other girls to grab from school to take to practice.
i sent adam a bulletted email that stated what had to be done.
i got a response...call me.
i did.
he said, tell me what you need me to do.  there are just too many words in that email.
ha.
silly boys.
i love him though. and that's all that matters! (right?!)
i have lots more to write and a picture here or there to post, i will catch up.
happy may 9th.  
a month from now, i will have already gone to the pool with the girls a week or so.
paid by debt to the library.
made brownies, or some baked treat.
spelled every word under the sun to write on the driveway....
read 2 books for my own pleasure.
the hamster wheel will be put away again till august.
i will survive.

thankful.

just rounded home....so happy! love this chick!

today i am thankful.
i am thankful for so many things....
awhile back i went for my annual well lady check up.
my well lady test came back weird.  this past monday i had to go get it investigated.
it was not horrible, but not something i would want to do each monday.
i really didn't give it a lot of thought....but as anyone does when it deals with the 'c' word (meaning cancer) it can eat at you...even sub consciously.
i got a call today.  it is 'clear'.  not super great. but passable.  i'm good with that.
yesterday, i wasn't feeling well.  i got sick in my car.  how gross is that?  sometimes you just have too.
adam had his first 'event' at the new office, the night before.
it was a 'happy hour'.  i was to attend.
yuck.
i didn't know what to wear.  i had picked out a nice pair of slacks and a blouse.
adam said....i think you should wear a dress...
my mom said....laura bush would wear a dress.
so i went to target.  bought a new pair of spanx and wore a dress.  no lie.
then i didn't eat dinner.
i ate a whole bunch of little smokies, a lot of mexican bean dip, and some sausage and cheese.  topped with a splash of wine.  yuck. my 35 year old gut said.  HECK NO.
gross. i got over it and taught my rear off....classy?!
anyway, i'm thankful that it passed (literally) it wasn't a bug, or anything more serious, and no i am not pregnant. i promise.
i am thankful that anne's little softball team, the sweet bees are progressing nicely.
they continue to lose, but that's okay.  they are hitting.  and fielding, kind of.  it's only the 4th game or so....i think by the 12th we should win.  hello they are only 7.
so that is about it.  i am just thankful.
as i told my mom today.  there are about 12 more days of school left and i am finally getting in the swing of things...
typical. right?!
sheesh.  love motherhood!
~chat soon!
p.s. if you look at the pic. look at little anne.  and then look at the BIG GIRL on 3rd.  SHE IS NOT 8 OR UNDER...do you THINK?!